It is programmed in us at an early age that our lives should look a certain way. We go to school, get a car, more school, then work, family, a house. That house must be shaped like a box next to more box-like houses, ideally for one family each with a room of their own. Gone are the days of small houses where multiple people share one bedroom, such as all the girls in one room and all the boys in another. Or grandma and grandpa living with the family and/or aunts, uncles and couslins. Why is this? Well much more money can be made for the builder if the houses get bigger and bigger and everyone needs their own house. It then becomes engrainied in culture. From there it becomes a status symbol of whose house is bigger than whose, and the race is on!
I recall growing up with friends that lived in split level houses with 3 sometimes 4 bedrooms. Those bedrooms were usually shared with at least one other sibling. Those were the big houses I remembered thinking. The average single family house has seemed to have doubled, tripled, even quadrupled or more in size since that time. I also recall my parents talking about their childhoods and having to share the basement amongst all the children 13 in my mother’s family and 9 in my father’s. So what happened? Did we evolve to requiring a certain amount of square footage? No, we have been told we need more by society, our culture, our builders. At the end of the day it is all about money. In so many ways. If we stop and think for a minute about how much money we put into our houses, “our boxes” if you will, it is such a huge slice of the pie chart. When we look at the down payment, the mortgage, interest, the taxes, the insurance, utilities, improvements, etc vs. what we spend on the rest of our needs. Do we really need to spend so much on a dwelling? So many of us live our whole lives working to pay for a box that with lots of space inside. Were lucky if we can pay it off just before we retire. Hmmm..makes sense.
How about we think a little outside the box for a moment. How about instead of pushing forward to keep up with the Joneses, how about we contemplate moving backwards. To a time when houses with half the square footage of those we would expect to live in now, or with the expectation of shared room, or multiple families sharing a home. Now think of shared expense. In some countries it is the norm for multiple families with multiple incomes sharing one home. Crowded you say? Perhaps, but how fast could that mortgage could be paid off with 4,5,6 or more incomes? What would you do if you owned a home free and clear? Again it is possible with a little thinking outside the box. I can name so many things off the bat that I would do if I owned my home free and clear. I would save up my money for an investment opportunity, maybe take a trip, build a business. Best of all I would have the freedom to use my money the way I choose.
Why give my the space you ask? Why should I live outside of my comfort zone you ask? You say you don’t live in third world country? Well no, but you make certain sacrificices to be frugal right? You budget don’t? You save up for the vacay. These are all sacfrifices you have decided will benefit you in the end. Well the same goes for your dwelling. Every situation is different, so you have to decide what is best for you.
For many reasons, my husband and I have wanted to create a sustainable homestead of multiple individuals and families. A community with a dwelling or dwellings designed to keep people outside with just enough room for sleep, protection, and shelter from weather and more outdoor amenities to keep us outside. I have many reasons for wanting to build this way. Cost is an obvious reason. The desire to be outside more is another. The smaller the dwelling, the greater the desire to be outside. I hear adults say all the time that they are mindful of their children’s screentime and force them to go outside to play for a certain amount of time per day. Is it not a good thing for adults to be outside as well?
My best advice to anyone thinking of purchasing a home is to think about your needs, wants, what you can handle financially, and what you can make do with. Most of all, don’t bite off more than you can chew. The category of housing is the most important to contemplate in life, as you will be making huge sacrifices for every square foot of that dwelling. You do not have to conform to the dominant paradigm.
